Episode Transcript
[00:00:00] Speaker A: Hi, I'm Maggie.
[00:00:01] Speaker B: I'm Nicole. Welcome to the DAC Dyslexia and Coffee Podcast. We're so happy you could join us. We're both moms and dyslexia interventionists who want to talk about our students and children, what dyslexia is, how it affects our kids, strategies to help and topics related to other learning disabilities that all we covered in this podcast. Parents are not alone and we want to give voice to the concerns and struggles we are all having.
This is a safe place to learn more about how to help our children grow and succeed in school, in the world. Grab a cup of coffee and enjoy the conversation.
[00:00:34] Speaker A: Hi, everybody.
Welcome to episode 75 of Dyslexia and Copy podcast.
[00:00:41] Speaker B: Yay. Yeah. 75. 75. Oh, my goodness.
[00:00:44] Speaker A: Oh my gosh. That's so exciting.
We're going to start today with the concept of the week, which is how we like to start all of our episodes here.
Today's concept of the week is mindfulness.
So mindfulness is the practice of paying deliberate and non judgmental attention to the present moment. Right. So observing your thoughts and feelings, what you're feeling in your body and the surroundings without getting carried away by them or labeling them as good or bad.
It's actually an innate human ability that we can kind of cultivate. Right. We can, we can strengthen that ability. But all humans do have this ability. It is inside of us.
We can strengthen it through things like meditation, helping to reduce our overall stress levels.
Helping us improve on our mindfulness does improve our focus and it just, it helps us be more aware.
I do think this is one of those topics too that kind of gets like, co opted into like, only like meditation and super vuh kind of practice.
But it's really not true. Mindfulness is really just that ability to, to pay attention to the present moment without like, like recognizing a feeling without assigning good, bad judgment onto it. Right.
[00:02:25] Speaker B: Like, there's a really quick way to do mindfulness where it's like, look and you find one thing in the room and then you smell one thing. Like you use five senses.
[00:02:35] Speaker A: Yep.
[00:02:36] Speaker B: And you just. And it's a quick little activity, but it.
[00:02:38] Speaker A: Exactly. And you can just like do it in your head too. I mean, it does not have to be, you know.
Yes. Practicing mindfulness can look like a meditation. It could, it could.
[00:02:53] Speaker B: But it also can be in your head. And it can also be like just being grateful and taking one minute even to just do something.
[00:03:02] Speaker A: It could be as simple as a deep breath. Deep breath.
Feel that air in, feel that air out.
You know, allowing yourself to take a second of pause just to recognize a moment.
That's mindfulness, correct? Yes.
[00:03:25] Speaker B: So episode 75 is about a meme.
It's been a meme that has been around for a while, but it's still shared all the time.
Like, I'm on social media in a lot of specialty parenting social media platforms, and it's shared, probably at least with someone.
[00:03:48] Speaker A: So I feel like this meme and the Holland poem.
[00:03:52] Speaker B: Yes.
[00:03:53] Speaker A: Shared share there.
[00:03:55] Speaker B: Yep.
[00:03:55] Speaker A: All the time.
And I like them both. Just for the record.
[00:03:58] Speaker B: Yes.
[00:03:59] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:04:00] Speaker B: So the meme is special needs parents fell in a hole.
The family member asks, when hole. The boss says, what a shame. Take the day off. The doctor says, can you take a diary of your experiences in the hole, which we talked about in the last episode?
Your mental health provider says, let's assess the size of the hole and however it may take up to, like, 18 months for us to decide it.
The local authority says, sorry, we don't have enough money for the ladder.
The charity says, here's a form, fill it out and apply to get on the waiting list for a ladder.
But another special needs parent says, wait a minute, I'm here. I'm coming down there with you. I've been here before. I know how to get out and I won't let you do it alone.
[00:04:52] Speaker A: Yeah, I feel like so much.
[00:04:55] Speaker B: There's a lot to unpack.
[00:04:57] Speaker A: There's a lot to unpack in that little meme. And I think it's mostly accurate.
[00:05:04] Speaker B: I think so.
And it's not because anybody is being like.
It's just the way it's. It goes.
[00:05:15] Speaker A: Correct. Correct. I don't think it is.
I don't think it's meant to disparage any of these other.
I mean, maybe the local authority that doesn't have the money for the ladder, maybe that's a little, like, ridiculous. But I don't think it's actually meant to, like, disparage any of these other professionals.
[00:05:38] Speaker B: Right.
[00:05:38] Speaker A: Who come alongside you.
[00:05:40] Speaker B: Right.
[00:05:40] Speaker A: Why is the doctor asking for a diary?
[00:05:42] Speaker B: Well, because they need to figure it out.
[00:05:44] Speaker A: They need to figure it out. And, like, they're not in the hole.
If everyone was in the hole, by the way, we'd be in trouble.
[00:05:53] Speaker B: We'd be in a lot of trouble.
[00:05:54] Speaker A: Yes.
So I like it because it is about.
Actually all of these different professionals are.
[00:06:07] Speaker B: Truly looking to help.
[00:06:09] Speaker A: To help.
[00:06:11] Speaker B: But they don't realize that at that moment you need help.
[00:06:15] Speaker A: Yes.
At that moment you need help. And the kind of help you need.
[00:06:20] Speaker B: Is just, it's okay.
[00:06:22] Speaker A: I see you.
[00:06:23] Speaker B: Right.
You just need to be acknowledged in the moment. And I think that's why this meme impacts so many social special needs parents because they know that everybody's trying to help them.
[00:06:37] Speaker A: Yes.
[00:06:38] Speaker B: But sometimes they just need somebody to be like, hey, I see you been there. Yeah, I know you'll get through this. Yes.
[00:06:48] Speaker A: It's like, I actually don't right now. I don't even need the next step of like, this is how you get out of the hole. I just like, thank you for being in the hole with me.
It always reminds me. And this is so after I had my purse.
[00:07:09] Speaker B: Right.
[00:07:09] Speaker A: So I was in the hospital after having had Aiden and I wasn't expecting to have to stay a second night. We thought we were going home, but I had him on a weekend so he had not gotten all of the tests that they needed because the, like, they weren't there. So I had to stay a second night only because he hadn't had his hearing screen. And the person who didn't, who was there to do it was not there because it was long story.
But I thought I was going home. So I was like, bye. And they were like, no.
And you know, the classic. Had not eaten all day. Had not.
You know, you have a baby and you totally forget that you're an actual person who needs care as well. And by the way, you just went through a thing that was kind of significant.
And my husband ended up going home because we have a dog.
And I was like, okay. Sent him home to get sleep so that I could have sleep the next day. When I did get home, I knew.
[00:08:17] Speaker B: I wasn't going to sleep in the.
[00:08:18] Speaker A: Hospital because who does?
And then it was a really difficult night.
He wasn't nursing and we were trying to figure that out. And it was just, you know, lots of just people cycling in all night and just telling me what to do all over the place, you know. And it was like that brand new, super raw mom feeling, like, I don't know what I'm doing and like, oh my gosh, should I even be a mom? Like, should this even happen?
And I.
[00:08:52] Speaker B: Late at that point.
[00:08:53] Speaker A: A little late.
[00:08:54] Speaker B: Little late.
[00:08:54] Speaker A: Right.
But like high hormones, you know, I mean, just.
[00:08:58] Speaker B: Right.
[00:08:59] Speaker A: The perfect storm.
And I'm really, truly not a ridiculous, like, I really actually not super emotional person. So when I get that hormone surge of like, to me it goes to like instant anger.
[00:09:15] Speaker B: Like.
[00:09:18] Speaker A: But one of the nurses came in and said, you know what? I think we're just going to take him to the nursery for a little while.
I think you just need some sleep. And I was like, you know what?
Yeah.
But then I heard the little wheels hit the carpet and I lost it, like completely lost it. Totally bawling.
[00:09:42] Speaker B: Totally.
[00:09:44] Speaker A: I don't think I've ever been, like, ever been.
[00:09:48] Speaker B: Truly.
[00:09:49] Speaker A: At that point, a different nurse came in, said nothing, said not one word, sat next to me, did not touch me, did not do anything. Turned like down the lights, because the lights were still on for whatever reason.
[00:10:07] Speaker B: What the heck?
[00:10:08] Speaker A: Turned down the lights, sat there until I was in a better state and left not one word the whole time.
[00:10:18] Speaker B: Interesting.
[00:10:19] Speaker A: And that's exactly what I needed.
[00:10:23] Speaker B: Right.
[00:10:23] Speaker A: And I feel like that's kind of what this means, is getting at. Right. Like actually what I really needed was nothing.
Like I just needed another physical body in the room to be present and that was it. And actually I really, truly was fine after that. We brought him back, he nursed, we were great.
[00:10:49] Speaker B: Yeah. It reminds me. So when Katherine was little, you know, she had seizures. So we had to do that five day stay in the hospital thing. And because we had other children, I had to be there alone.
[00:11:01] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:11:01] Speaker B: And so let's put the kid with sensory issues with. I mean, they put. They glue them to their head, right? They glue all that stuff to your head, then they wrap it and then you have all these leads, like to the box. Everywhere. Everywhere, Right. And it pulls on your head and you can't move and you can't get out of the bed. And you're not supposed to be running around. And she was like four or five. And I was like, really, guys?
[00:11:29] Speaker A: Like, this is a good idea. This is happening.
[00:11:32] Speaker B: And so I was supposed to keep her calm. I was supposed to bed, I was supposed to do all this stuff. And because she had a lot of meltdowns at that time, nobody would come in.
So I was by myself the whole time I was there.
And I just remember one of the last days that I was in there, one of her therapists came in from outside the hospital and was like. She came in, she just kind of looked at us. And I must have.
[00:12:06] Speaker A: I'm sure I looked like, oh, like you've been through it because you had.
[00:12:10] Speaker B: Because she wouldn't take the medicine because the medicine tasted different. So then that was a fight. And they couldn't make her not take it because that was part of the reason.
[00:12:19] Speaker A: Part of the reason you're there.
[00:12:20] Speaker B: Right. They want to get your medicine. Right. So that you're not Having seizures and it was such a thing. And so, like.
And then she was trying to curl up me. And then they were trying. She was trying to pull things out. And so then we had to, like, literally, they strapped her down, which. I don't know if that was even supposed to happen, but it happened. Awful.
And, you know, then at that point, she's like, no, she just came in, she looked at me, and she's like, I'm not even gonna ask, how you doing?
Because I know. And I'm just gonna sit here.
[00:12:55] Speaker A: Why are you gonna ask me that question?
[00:12:57] Speaker B: Why don't you just go get some water for a couple minutes? And that's. None of the nurses gave me a break because Katherine would not.
And Chris couldn't be there. Yeah.
[00:13:10] Speaker A: Because you have other kids. Right.
[00:13:12] Speaker B: And they were little at the time, and so it was just me and. No. But not one other person offered to sit with her for any period of time.
So. Yeah. I do not recommend.
But that was. That's where I think the swinging kind of shows.
You just sometimes need to be present for somebody.
[00:13:33] Speaker A: Yes.
Yes, absolutely.
Yeah. I feel like, you know, no surprise that these parents, they identify with this meme. Right. And, like, it's being shared.
I mean, of course.
[00:13:55] Speaker B: And, like, some of the things in there.
There's stuff that happens that you can't do anything about. Right.
Like, yeah. Sometimes it takes 18 months or longer to do something for mental health right now because there's not enough providers.
Yeah. There's forms for charities that have to fill them out. I mean, that is a thing.
[00:14:18] Speaker A: They are beholden to whatever their shareholders. They're. I mean, depending on where it is.
[00:14:25] Speaker B: Yeah. Wherever they get their money from.
You know, so there's. There's, like, literally reasons why some of these things are. What, the way they are.
[00:14:36] Speaker A: Yeah, absolutely.
[00:14:38] Speaker B: Because. And it's not anybody's fault. Agree. It's just.
That's the way it works.
And does it really help you at the time you really need it? Sometimes not.
[00:14:51] Speaker A: Sometimes not. Sometimes not. Yeah. It's.
You know. And again. Right. It's like, okay, all of these different professionals have a different way of looking at it. That is their training and background.
[00:15:03] Speaker B: Right.
[00:15:04] Speaker A: You actually don't want your doctor to just jump in a hole with you because, I mean, you want them to empathize. Right. And, like, be present with you.
[00:15:13] Speaker B: Right.
[00:15:14] Speaker A: But guess what? If they're stuck in that hole, too? That's not great.
That's not.
[00:15:18] Speaker B: But who's gonna pull? Yeah. I don't know.
[00:15:21] Speaker A: Right.
[00:15:21] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:15:22] Speaker A: It's like the.
But like the alone feeling that I think all parents at some point really do feel. I think, yes. Having a child with a special need elevates that.
[00:15:41] Speaker B: I think so.
[00:15:41] Speaker A: And does put it in a unique category.
But I think all parents are in a hole sometimes.
[00:15:53] Speaker B: Yes, I agree. There was actually.
I mean, and that said this morning, they said everything would be better after they were a baby.
[00:16:05] Speaker A: Oh, my God.
[00:16:06] Speaker B: But no, that doesn't actually. That's not true either. No, no, no. It's just different things.
[00:16:13] Speaker A: It just gets different.
[00:16:15] Speaker B: Right.
[00:16:15] Speaker A: It just gets.
[00:16:16] Speaker B: It's not different.
The same, but. But it's still not easy, you know?
[00:16:21] Speaker A: And I think definitely, well meaning family members.
[00:16:26] Speaker B: Right.
[00:16:26] Speaker A: They can be as supportive, but man, they could just really say some harsh things.
[00:16:34] Speaker B: They can.
[00:16:36] Speaker A: That I don't really think they mean to.
[00:16:41] Speaker B: They don't.
[00:16:42] Speaker A: They don't understand.
[00:16:44] Speaker B: Some do.
[00:16:44] Speaker A: Some do. And that's another.
That's another episode.
Yeah.
[00:16:51] Speaker B: But like, even.
Because they, like, just like, you can't really relate to somebody who's like. Like, I wouldn't be able to relate to somebody who's like an elite athlete.
[00:17:02] Speaker A: Right.
[00:17:02] Speaker B: Because I am not one.
But it's the same thing, right?
[00:17:10] Speaker A: Yes, it's.
[00:17:13] Speaker B: I walk and I do that kind of stuff, but that doesn't tell me what their life is like.
[00:17:18] Speaker A: I don't live the kind of life that you have to think about every single thing that goes into your body. You have to think about every. There's. That is not exactly.
[00:17:28] Speaker B: So in that comparison, having a typical developing child and then a special needs child. It's not the same.
[00:17:35] Speaker A: It's not the same.
[00:17:36] Speaker B: It's not the same. Even though it can be hard in both areas.
[00:17:38] Speaker A: Yeah, there's overlap. Obviously.
[00:17:40] Speaker B: There is overlap.
[00:17:41] Speaker A: You know, there's the obvious overlaps.
You know, definitely, if you have a kid with some outward behaviors.
[00:17:51] Speaker B: Right.
[00:17:53] Speaker A: That's a different animal.
[00:17:58] Speaker B: And I think it's really hard for us too, as parents that have children with like, the invisible disability.
[00:18:05] Speaker A: Definitely. Yes.
[00:18:06] Speaker B: Because.
Oh, yeah. If you see it.
Oh, okay. That family has something else going on.
[00:18:15] Speaker A: Yep.
[00:18:16] Speaker B: But our kids don't really see any difference from other kids.
[00:18:20] Speaker A: Yep.
[00:18:21] Speaker B: And everybody's like, well, just tell them this.
[00:18:24] Speaker A: Yeah. I think it's followed by just, yes, just do this. I don't want to hear the conclusion of that sentence because to be honest, that just tells me you don't get it.
You don't. You don't understand anything. Followed by just X, Y, Z. Like, no, that's.
That's not It.
[00:18:54] Speaker B: That's not it.
And obviously there's that grief cycle that.
[00:19:02] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:19:03] Speaker B: We have to go through, which happens over and over again, unfortunately.
[00:19:10] Speaker A: And it's a cycle. It's. It's a cycle.
Not linear. Like, I don't.
[00:19:18] Speaker B: You're like, well, you should be over that. You've had that diagnosis since she was 4, right? Yeah. But it looks different when she's 14.
[00:19:24] Speaker A: Kind of the idea of stages of grief and like, the last one being acceptance is like, I don't.
[00:19:32] Speaker B: I accept it's there.
[00:19:34] Speaker A: But Correct.
[00:19:35] Speaker B: Now I'm seeing it in a different way. Totally.
[00:19:37] Speaker A: That there is that.
No, I really think it is a cycle.
[00:19:43] Speaker B: Yes.
[00:19:44] Speaker A: And I think that it is.
[00:19:49] Speaker B: Important.
[00:19:50] Speaker A: To give that its grace and space. And.
[00:19:55] Speaker B: It'S okay.
[00:19:56] Speaker A: Not even just okay.
You deserve to have thoughts and feelings.
[00:20:03] Speaker B: Yes.
[00:20:04] Speaker A: Around your child's diagnosis.
Like, and actually you need to in order to process and live your own full life. Which, by the way, parents are people.
[00:20:21] Speaker B: Exactly.
[00:20:21] Speaker A: They are their own human beings with their own thoughts and feelings.
And the idea that we're just kind of just supposed to accept whatever. Whatever comes our way is a little.
I don't love it. It really rubs me the wrong way. Or the idea that I have feelings and I'm sad about my kids diagnosis sometimes makes me somehow like a bad mom.
Chafes me a lot too.
[00:20:58] Speaker B: Right.
[00:20:59] Speaker A: No, no, no, no. I'm allowed to feel that way and at the same time recognize and appreciate all the things that make my head. My head.
[00:21:16] Speaker B: Right. Because they do bring some amazing opportunities to us too.
[00:21:21] Speaker A: Absolutely. But it is both and always.
[00:21:25] Speaker B: Right.
[00:21:25] Speaker A: Not one or the other.
[00:21:28] Speaker B: Right.
[00:21:30] Speaker A: You know, and it's not one size fits all.
[00:21:36] Speaker B: Just because somebody else has a diagnosis that we have, that doesn't mean that their journey is the same.
[00:21:42] Speaker A: Exactly.
[00:21:43] Speaker B: So being aware of that is also important.
So, like, I think some things that you can help guide you through some of these things. You know, surround yourself with supportive people that get it. You know, there's support groups, even one other parent that has gone through something or is going through something that can really help. There's also organizations that are national that care or that you can be connected with a parent. Yep. And I think just knowing that you're not alone. And if you have to go to, like, a therapist for a while to help process all this.
[00:22:21] Speaker A: Go, go, go, go.
It's.
It's good. That's a good thing. That means that you are actually putting your child first.
[00:22:35] Speaker B: Right. Because your cup is empty.
[00:22:39] Speaker A: You can't.
[00:22:40] Speaker B: You can't do anything.
[00:22:41] Speaker A: You can't do anything.
[00:22:45] Speaker B: And sometimes, like we were talking about families, sometimes they want to help, but they don't know how.
[00:22:49] Speaker A: Yes.
[00:22:49] Speaker B: So being able to be open with them and saying, hey, if you could just make a dinner or if you could just. Yes, do this.
[00:22:57] Speaker A: This is. And, you know, one of the things I think I'm learning the lesson and continue to learn the lesson and probably always will, actually.
[00:23:11] Speaker B: The people in your life, they do.
[00:23:14] Speaker A: Want to help, and they actually often are looking for little ways to do that, to do that.
[00:23:21] Speaker B: I'm horrible at asking for help, though. You can believe me. Maggie always has to ask me on the way out, are you sure you don't want me to carry something?
[00:23:30] Speaker A: I just carry a bag. Well, and also, if you are a person who is in.
If someone in your life. Right. Is going through a tough time, just carry the box for them.
[00:23:45] Speaker B: Just do it.
[00:23:46] Speaker A: You know, they're not often gonna ask for that.
I think specifically in the region of the country we live in, it's all fine.
[00:23:55] Speaker B: I'm fine. They're fine. It's fine.
[00:23:57] Speaker A: I'm fine.
[00:23:57] Speaker B: Everything's good.
[00:24:01] Speaker A: You know, you don't let on everything's fine. Smile on your face.
And yes, I will be at that party. And yes, I will bring that casserole. And yes, I will do all of these things, even though inside I'm kind of dying.
[00:24:16] Speaker B: Yes.
[00:24:18] Speaker A: I think that.
I don't know. The more I actually let other people do those things for me, the more I go, okay, actually, that was a way to, like, feed them and myself.
[00:24:38] Speaker B: Right.
[00:24:38] Speaker A: They got to do something.
[00:24:41] Speaker B: Exactly.
[00:24:42] Speaker A: For me.
And I still got help. Like.
[00:24:46] Speaker B: Right.
[00:24:47] Speaker A: Okay.
I'm not perfect that I will need continuous improvement in that area, but because I think in our profession, too, not only in just the region of the country, but also in our professions. Right. Like, we're the helpers.
[00:25:05] Speaker B: Correct.
[00:25:06] Speaker A: We're the ones that.
[00:25:07] Speaker B: Which also makes it hard.
[00:25:08] Speaker A: Which.
[00:25:09] Speaker B: To ask for help.
[00:25:09] Speaker A: Makes it hard to ask for help.
But it is just important that we do that.
[00:25:17] Speaker B: Right?
[00:25:18] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:25:19] Speaker B: And also not letting your child's disability define you or your child. Absolutely. You gotta celebrate their accomplishments, their successes, no matter how small. They all try to live in the moment and enjoy your child as the person they are. Because you're so special.
[00:25:40] Speaker A: Exactly. You know.
[00:25:43] Speaker B: And I really like this one.
Right. Yes. You gotta laugh at yourself.
[00:25:48] Speaker A: Critical, critical. Critical to the equation. I mean, if we cannot laugh about it, then we actually can't process.
[00:26:00] Speaker B: Correct.
Yes. Because honestly.
Yep. That happened.
Yep. Yep.
[00:26:08] Speaker A: That.
[00:26:09] Speaker B: That. That didn't sure happen.
The kids are sure flying across the room off of the couches. Need to stop that.
Yep. Floor is llama, people.
[00:26:22] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:26:24] Speaker B: Yep. Gotta laugh.
That's only the six that we've bought since we were born.
[00:26:32] Speaker A: Yeah. I feel like we're on four, so that tracks. And my kids are a couple years behind your kids, so to be honest.
[00:26:39] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:26:40] Speaker A: Yeah. Tracks, man.
[00:26:42] Speaker B: Couches do not live up to.
[00:26:44] Speaker A: No, they.
[00:26:45] Speaker B: What? They should.
They don't. They can't.
They don't. They don't.
So, Maggie, what's happening outside of dyslexia?
[00:26:55] Speaker A: Oh, my gosh.
So it is January as we record this.
And honestly, when I flipped that calendar, I was like, all right, yay, we're past December. But then I looked at what is coming my way, and I was like.
[00:27:16] Speaker B: It'S not going to be an easier moment. Ew.
[00:27:18] Speaker A: It doesn't stop.
But we're done with the holidays. Why is my life still crazy?
[00:27:25] Speaker B: I don't like it. I don't.
I.
I don't.
[00:27:32] Speaker A: I do not appreciate the, like, go, go, go. Must be here.
This is just not my favorite.
We are adjusting to Tuesdays, specifically are really tough. My son has tutoring on Tuesdays, and we have scouts on Tuesdays.
And, oh, by the way, we have to make dinner at some point.
[00:28:00] Speaker B: Yeah, the dinner thing.
[00:28:01] Speaker A: Kids have to eat every day, multiple times a day. I'm not sure.
Yeah, I'm just, like, not sure I signed up for that, to be honest.
[00:28:11] Speaker B: They have to eat short order, cook.
[00:28:13] Speaker A: Every single day, multiple times a day, and I'm apparently responsible for making that happen. What the heck?
So it's like figuring out and, I don't know, adding.
Adding to the plate of, like, we're really trying to be intentional about, like.
[00:28:36] Speaker B: No.
[00:28:36] Speaker A: Yes. It's nice that Culver's is right there, but that is not how we're going to rely on feeding our family every. You know, it got to be way too much. Yes, I am.
I am.
Please hear me. We do do that.
[00:28:55] Speaker B: Right?
[00:28:56] Speaker A: But it got too much.
We were relying on those fast food options way too much and too often. And it does really affect our health and wellbeing. So trying to figure out how to just manage it all.
[00:29:18] Speaker B: So, yeah. Is it is tough.
[00:29:21] Speaker A: Is really tough, you know, and as kids get older and are involved in more things, as you well know, it just gets even more difficult to manage.
And I'm really. I am intentional about, like, my kids are in one activity at a time because I do not like this till they get older, run around. Run around business. And I don't think it's a. It's not really. It's not healthy for them either. Like, they're gonna be completely dysregulated.
[00:29:54] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:29:55] Speaker A: And so you know, the word no is a complete sentence. And like, if you're already tells me.
[00:30:01] Speaker B: That all the time.
[00:30:04] Speaker A: Something has to give.
And we're kind of in that. Okay, what.
What has to give to make these things happen?
Which I don't enjoy.
I don't like it.
[00:30:21] Speaker B: Like, no, thank you.
[00:30:25] Speaker A: So forward to clear the slate.
[00:30:28] Speaker B: And that's not what happens. No, it doesn't happen. Yeah. It gets just worse.
But yeah. So for us, we realized we have a year longer on our lease because for a car, I love our car. It can either take the children and everybody somewhere or it can take all my work stuff somewhere. It can't do both.
So my husband has decided we needed to start looking at cars now because we have. It'll take us probably a year.
[00:31:01] Speaker A: But I don't think he's wrong, you know, hesitate to be on Chris's side yet again. But he's probably not wrong that you.
[00:31:06] Speaker B: Have to think about it now every night.
Every night. Do I really want to look at him and talk.
[00:31:12] Speaker A: Oh, gosh, okay. I'm sorry. I take it back. I'm not on Chris's side anymore. This is not an everyday thing.
[00:31:18] Speaker B: Oh, look at this one. Look at that one. He's pointing out everything.
[00:31:21] Speaker A: I forget that you're married to the same really personality that I am married to.
[00:31:29] Speaker B: I just like, honestly people cars for me, one place to another place. If I like it for the aesthetics, great.
Not my husband. It's got to be a certain type, certain kind, certain thing.
I'm like, come on. I don't care what engine is in there.
[00:31:49] Speaker A: I don't care about that. That is not interesting to me. I do not care about that.
[00:31:54] Speaker B: I have other things to do.
[00:31:55] Speaker A: I do that.
That is an area of my life. I happily give basically the full responsibility over to my head. Like, I don't care. You're in charge of all of that. I don't even drive. Honestly. Like, I don't even drive. So, like, that's not my deal. Thank you.
[00:32:18] Speaker B: So anyways, that's been a thing in our house probably continuously till next January.
[00:32:26] Speaker A: Yuck.
I.
Here's me seeing where you are and sympathizing with that.
[00:32:39] Speaker B: Honestly, to me, they all look alike.
[00:32:49] Speaker A: I don't.
[00:32:49] Speaker B: And the heat works. That's kind of the thing.
Other than that I'm usually pretty good with that.
[00:32:56] Speaker A: Whatever.
[00:32:58] Speaker B: Thanks for listening to me in that spot, but that's kind of our thing right now.
[00:33:06] Speaker A: Well, thank you everybody for listening. Please follow us on social media and reach out if you have any questions or you would like us to discuss a topic. If you do like our show, be sure to follow and rate us on your favorite podcast players. This is how we get more listeners and then we get to help our parents. Thank you.
[00:33:24] Speaker B: Thank you.
