Episode 65-Holiday Yikes

[00:00:00] Speaker A: Hi, I'm Maggie. [00:00:01] Speaker B: And I'm Nicole. Welcome to the DAC Dyslexia and Coffee Podcast. We're so happy you could join us. We are both moms and dyslexia interventionists who want to talk about our students and children. What dyslexia is, how it affects our kids, strategies to help and topics related to other learning disabilities will also be covered in this podcast. Parents are not alone, and we want to give a voice to the concerns and struggles we are all having. This is a safe place to learn more about how to help our children grow and succeed in school, in the world. Grab a cup of coffee and enjoy the conversation. [00:00:34] Speaker A: Hi, everybody. We're going to start today's episode like we do every time, with the concept of the week. So the concept of the week is our opportunity as practitioners to kind of peel back the curtain a little bit and let everyone into an intervention session. We like to talk about things that we would either be teaching directly to our students or. Or discussing with their parents. So today's concept of the week is frustration tolerance. Oh, yes. Frustration tolerance is the ability to endure stress and setbacks without experiencing overwhelm. So that ability to deal with the stress without sending your body into flight freight or freeze mode. Good luck, folks. Today is episode 65, and we're calling it Holiday Yikes. [00:01:35] Speaker B: For a reason. [00:01:36] Speaker A: Tis the season, everybody. [00:01:38] Speaker B: Yes. [00:01:39] Speaker A: Tis the season. [00:01:42] Speaker B: All right. [00:01:43] Speaker A: We came ready. [00:01:44] Speaker B: We came ready to talk about our yikes that happens for us during the season. [00:01:49] Speaker A: Yeah. I mean, okay, so full disclosure. This episode is going to be kind of a laundry list of things. [00:01:58] Speaker B: That. [00:01:58] Speaker A: We find really stressful and things that people do not specifically address. With kids, when you have any. Any kind of special need. Right. Like, these are the things that stress all families out. [00:02:13] Speaker B: But. [00:02:15] Speaker A: When you have any kind of child with a special need, these are things that just add even more things to our plates. And we're just here to voice them and listen to each other today. That's what we're here to do, everybody. So may this find you in your head. Yes. [00:02:39] Speaker B: You can probably follow along pretty well. Yeah, I think. [00:02:42] Speaker A: Absolutely. [00:02:42] Speaker B: This is stuff that I think we all go through. [00:02:44] Speaker A: Absolutely, absolutely. Oh, we came so ready to record to this today. [00:02:51] Speaker B: We did the first one. Sensory toys that are not good for sensory children. [00:02:59] Speaker A: I just. This drives me all the way crazy. I do not understand how. I do understand because it's like making a buck. I feel like these days, sensory is like a buzzword. [00:03:12] Speaker B: Correct. [00:03:13] Speaker A: And people think like, oh, this is sensory friendly. What is Sensory friendly about flashing lights. Nothing obnoxiously bright color. I like a bright color, but I mean, come on, what is good about. [00:03:31] Speaker B: Yeah. Why do they not make toys any longer that you can turn others out and they're trash. [00:03:38] Speaker A: They are the worst quality items. They break immediately and all they do is make noise. [00:03:47] Speaker B: I hate them all the time. [00:03:49] Speaker A: I hate them. [00:03:49] Speaker B: And their motion usually sets. Motion usually sets them off too. Which also is. Is we have dogs. So our dogs walk past it in the middle of the night and all of a sudden you hear, woo. [00:04:00] Speaker A: Oh, my God. I swear we have this like sensory toy, quote unquote. It was like this stupid helicopter thing and it said something about like, I don't even remember what the phrase was, but it was awful. And I swear with like all things that it would. It would just get triggered and go off and we. I don't know, I swear I thought we lost it, like completely lost it. And unfortunately we didn't. [00:04:32] Speaker B: Can you hear it again? [00:04:33] Speaker A: Can you hear it again? [00:04:34] Speaker B: I just. [00:04:35] Speaker A: Stop calling. If you're going to make an obnoxious toy and call it, just don't call it a sensory toy. Okay. [00:04:42] Speaker B: Yes. Because there are specific sensory toys and products that are really great. So we're not saying this about all of this. It's the ones that are not actual sensory products that your occupational therapist or your school psych or maybe your special ed teacher would recommend. These are the ones that are manufactured. [00:05:10] Speaker A: Everywhere and well meaning people who do not really know your children that well purchase them for you and they come into your home and you hope that they don't last. Yeah. I mean, again, this is where I have never been above that needs to leave my house and it's never coming back. I don't even. [00:05:43] Speaker B: I mean, it starts off our auditory students and children a lot, right? [00:05:48] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:05:48] Speaker B: Those noises, the flashing lights can set off seizures. Like, there's lots of different reasons why they're just not good. [00:05:57] Speaker A: They're not. They're not. They are not good. There are. I mean, to Nicole's point, there are excellent sensory toys that really do exist. [00:06:06] Speaker B: Yes. [00:06:06] Speaker A: If you are a person who is out there doing your holiday purchasing and you see a label that says sensory, do everyone a favor and like consult somebody. [00:06:20] Speaker B: Or at least look up. Because there's a lot of things that will tell you, like, anything. Now you can see what the Yelp score is or the Google score. [00:06:30] Speaker A: You know what I mean? [00:06:31] Speaker B: You can say, oh, this family didn't like it because you can't turn down the noise. Or you can't turn it off. And so it just. [00:06:39] Speaker A: Yeah. You know, and like, furthermore, if you are a person walking about that on purpose, purchases things that make obnoxious noises for the parents in your life. Please stop. It's not cool. It's not cool. Please stop. Psa. Don't do it. Hot take. [00:06:58] Speaker B: All right, so our next topic is disrupted schedules. [00:07:01] Speaker A: Oh, my word. [00:07:04] Speaker B: So obviously these things are things that we bring forth because they are things that we have experienced. [00:07:12] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:07:13] Speaker B: So, like, the schedule changes of. First of all, not going to school is a big thing. Right. [00:07:19] Speaker A: We all know how I feel about that. [00:07:21] Speaker B: Go to school and then people eat at different times because of the holidays. They go to people's houses later than normal. They don't go to sleep at the same time. All that compounds in our children, and it makes them so overloaded, and they just. Their frustration tolerance goes way down and so does their parents. [00:07:46] Speaker A: Yes. And I feel like this is something, too, that I feel like it is. Has increased tremendously since, like, our own childhood. Yes. We had the holiday concerts. We had the, like, things that were at school. We had the things that if we were involved in, like a sport or activity, you know, usually there's some kind of holiday thing associated with that. [00:08:13] Speaker B: Right. [00:08:14] Speaker A: But I feel like the amount of everything has just increased and the expectation that you don't have to do it all. I am definitely a person who very firmly believes that a routine is important. And. And also our kids do have to develop frustration tolerance and the ability to roll with changes and be flexible. But it is impossible to strike any kind of continuity when it's like just disruption, disruption, disruption, disruption. [00:08:52] Speaker B: Or. [00:08:54] Speaker A: I don't know. And I feel like the. Even holiday season is so much longer. I mean. [00:08:58] Speaker B: Yes. Well, you know, we could have gotten all of our Christmas stuff around Halloween or before Halloween, because Halloween was out in August. I'm not really sure why, but. Yes. [00:09:08] Speaker A: Yeah, I agree. It's extended. And so this disruption in schedules and, you know, kind of leads into our next gripe, which is just families who really, truly don't understand when your kid has a special need and sometimes they can't do what other children do. And, like, that is okay. [00:09:36] Speaker B: Yes. Let's say that again, this is okay if you can't do everything. Yes. [00:09:41] Speaker A: Or if it doesn't look quite the same. [00:09:45] Speaker B: Right. If you have to change something, change it. You know, it's. And I think this is a really hard concept because it took me a while to learn. I tried to fit in with everybody else. Every holiday. And it never worked because we would be screaming and leaving in the middle of the festivities every time. So now we're very structured in our unstructured time. [00:10:16] Speaker A: Yeah. Because you really have to be, you know, and it's just. I think it is one of those things that, you know, Auntie Margie, who raised her kid in, you know, not now. [00:10:34] Speaker B: Right. [00:10:34] Speaker A: And her kids were typically developing and, you know. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We did everything this way. I mean, that's great that that worked for you. My suspicion is that it didn't actually work for you though. Auntie Bargy. It's fictitious, by the way. I do not have an anti. Bargy. But I just one. I suspect that actually that didn't work for you. And a lot of times that, like, judginess is coming from a place of like, well, I had to suck it up and do it. So you do too. [00:11:04] Speaker B: Right. [00:11:04] Speaker A: And I just. No thing. I just don't really want to operate that anymore. It's not interesting to me. [00:11:11] Speaker B: Exactly. [00:11:12] Speaker A: You know, there are times and ways that I do want to push my kids to participate in things that maybe is not their favorite thing. [00:11:23] Speaker B: Correct. [00:11:23] Speaker A: But that has to be balanced on the other end of things that I can get them to do. Or we're not building any skills. [00:11:31] Speaker B: We're just throwing everybody into chaos. [00:11:36] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:11:36] Speaker B: The chaos. [00:11:37] Speaker A: You know, I definitely have. I think. I don't want to say mastered because I don't think I'm ever going to be there. But like, definitely I have taken the liberty as a mom to say that does not work for my family. We will do this part and not that part. [00:11:53] Speaker B: Correct. [00:11:53] Speaker A: You know, we'll be there when we're over there. [00:11:58] Speaker B: The next one is society expectations around the holiday. I think we kind of discussed that one already. [00:12:02] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:12:03] Speaker B: Because that's. I like the next one. Different types of meals and how our kids don't deal well with it. Yes. My kids only eat certain foods. Yes. Sometimes I have to give them a hot dog on Christmas. Sorry. [00:12:18] Speaker A: And I think it's kind of the. All of it too. It's like, what is it to you if I do just give my kid a hot dog? You don't see me the other 90% of the time when I am trying to get my kid to try something new. I mean, in my house I do introduce a lot of different foods. [00:12:41] Speaker B: Right. [00:12:42] Speaker A: Food is a big deal in our house. We cook a lot together. We try new things. It's kind of just part of our family culture that we. [00:12:50] Speaker B: I guess what we're saying in a stressful situation, you're not introducing something new. [00:12:54] Speaker A: I'm not. I'm giving them the steak and chicken nuggets that they like. [00:12:57] Speaker B: I know, right? Like, because, hello, anything that's covered with something is probably. So we know that's already gonna set them off. So why are we doing that? When there's lots of people around in a different environment with a lot of different things going on? That's not a great time to do it. [00:13:15] Speaker A: It's not a great time to do it. And also my kids who do try lots of different foods and are exposed to lots of different things and genuinely are not picky eaters. The plethora of just crappy food that is out all the time at the holidays where they do graze on it and they're eating foods that do not make sense on one plate together at one time. Like they get physically ill. It does not work well with their body systems. And I don't. Why, why am I forcing them to do this? It's not good for them. It's not good for me. [00:14:03] Speaker B: Correct. [00:14:03] Speaker A: Who is this serving? [00:14:06] Speaker B: Yeah, yeah. So our next topic. So when your children. So you know there's ages on most toys, right? Yeah. And sometimes peers of your children are ready for those age appropriate items and sometimes our kids are not. And how do you negotiate that? Because it is hard. People look at ages on toys to get things for your kids. Sometimes that is not appropriate for your kid. Especially when you don't see certain people all the time. [00:14:48] Speaker A: Yes. Or I mean, here's kind of a separate gripe of mine. I like this weird pressure of like you have to buy a gift for every kid, like all the things and then they just kind of choose something that doesn't make sense for your kid. And now you're stuck dealing with it, you know, and then you are kind of left with this like, am I an ungrateful person that this item has come into my house? I don't want it. It's not appropriate for my kid. Either they're absolutely not ready for it or it's just not. Either they're absolutely not ready for it or you have a kid who. That just doesn't fit, you know, that. [00:15:31] Speaker B: Just doesn't fit their personality, their interests, their. [00:15:39] Speaker A: Their abilities. Their abilities. Right. You know? [00:15:43] Speaker B: Yes. [00:15:44] Speaker A: No, it's really hard, you know, and like the big ticket items too, where, you know, tis the season where kids are getting things like cell phones and tablets and trying to navigate. I mean, I have a friend who her in laws Took the liberty of gifting their eight year old a full on smartphone last season. [00:16:19] Speaker B: Yikes. [00:16:20] Speaker A: And she had to stand up for, you know, her kid and her family and like put that really like absolutely not. That's nowhere near appropriate of a gift. And now I have to explain why my 8 year old can't have it and like absolutely not. [00:16:45] Speaker B: Yeah. And some of it is not just that they're not appropriate, but sometimes it's the fact that they haven't asked the family. [00:16:55] Speaker A: Yes. [00:16:57] Speaker B: What their thoughts are on certain things for a certain age. Right. There's different families that an 8 year old would get that and there's other families where they won't and that's dependent per family. And those type of gifts are really hard for parents to navigate, I think. [00:17:22] Speaker A: Absolutely. You know, and just the like, that wasn't, that wasn't really yours to give. You know, that is, that is not appropriate for someone who is not the decision maker in the family to. [00:17:39] Speaker B: Right. [00:17:40] Speaker A: To give that kind of thing. And I just, you have to, you have to really walk that hard line. And it gets harder and harder the older they get. The older they get. Right. You know, that's, that kind of. We can think of things when our kids are little or you know, when my kids were little I was excellent at culling the, the hoard of toys. [00:18:09] Speaker B: True. [00:18:10] Speaker A: Because. [00:18:10] Speaker B: But now they see it. [00:18:11] Speaker A: Now they, well, now they see it and they also remember it. [00:18:14] Speaker B: Yes. [00:18:15] Speaker A: You know, when they were little I was quite skilled at. Nope, that's not, not gonna happen. It's not gonna happen. You know, and now it's like the peer to peer kind of relationships and comparison game that happens all the time but like is turned all the way up at the holidays. It is, is, is really, really a tough thing. And then you have to layer additionally that's hard for every family, every parent. Additionally, now you have to layer on a kid with any kind of neurodiversity. [00:18:54] Speaker B: Correct. Because they might even be further behind their peers and they see them getting it and they don't understand. [00:19:06] Speaker A: Yes, exactly. They don't, they don't understand. And it is more than just, you know, here in our house. These are the rules which is, you know, usually my go to and it still, always will be right. I still get to make the decisions for as for me and my house, this is what's appropriate. But the fact that I have to continue to repeat myself and have to kind of continue to, you know, it's just, it's, it gets really kind of exhausting. [00:19:37] Speaker B: It does it really does. [00:19:41] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:19:41] Speaker B: And this is also a time when for us parents that can. It can be right in our face. Right. So it's also a time when you might need to do a little self care because you're seeing peers of your kids and you obviously see the differences and it's okay to need time. [00:20:06] Speaker A: Yeah, yeah. It's, you know, when you see the kind of like, separation of the pack a bit. [00:20:13] Speaker B: Yep. [00:20:14] Speaker A: That can be really jarring as a parent. And like you said, one, remembering to, like, bring that self care aspect and then two, trying to separate your own things from it too. [00:20:28] Speaker B: Right. [00:20:29] Speaker A: As a parent, we bring our own stuff to everything and the holidays do turn it up. Because who doesn't have a memory of a Christmas where your friend got the brand new, latest, greatest, whatever, you know, whatever the hot ticket item was. And like, you did not. You got underwear. You know, I mean, extreme examples, but like. Absolutely, absolutely. You're bringing your own stuff to the table. [00:21:02] Speaker B: Correct. [00:21:03] Speaker A: Because you're remembering that feeling. As a parent, you don't want your kid to experience that even if you do fully understand. It is good for our kids to experience some disappointment, some things that they have to kind of be gritty about. It's good for our kids to experience some of that thing. Some of those things. But, like, it's our job to kind of thread the needle a bit. And if we are so far down the road at, like, our own comparison game, that can be incredibly hard to do. And also like to find the people that really actually do get you. [00:21:48] Speaker B: Right. [00:21:49] Speaker A: Because I think sometimes this kind of conversation turns into the, like, well, there's nothing you can do about it, so too bad. And it's like. But I'm not saying it has to be fixed. I'm just saying this is a. This is hard. Like, I'm allowed to say this is hard, and I'm frustrated about it. [00:22:08] Speaker B: Right. [00:22:08] Speaker A: And I don't. I don't know that I need it fixed. I don't think there's a fix here. It's just that it is hard. [00:22:15] Speaker B: Yeah, I agree. This next one's hard. [00:22:21] Speaker A: Yeah. You know, and I think the other thing that can be extremely difficult for our kids to navigate is kind of the quote, unquote magic of it all. If there are tiny listeners in the room. We are trying to be cryptic. [00:22:40] Speaker B: Yes. [00:22:41] Speaker A: But some kids believe in the holiday magic fully and completely. [00:22:47] Speaker B: And they might be a lot older than you would realize. [00:22:52] Speaker A: Yes. [00:22:54] Speaker B: And how to keep navigating that. [00:22:56] Speaker A: Yes. [00:22:58] Speaker B: Knowing that their peers probably are different yes. [00:23:06] Speaker A: In that belief, you know? You know, and like, the. The older kids who still embody all of that magic, you know, it's like that push and pull where, as a parent, I'd love that to continue forever if it could, but in the best interest of that kid, you almost feel like you have to, as gently as you can, burst that bubble at a certain point, which is so hard. And, you know, and making that call. It's different for every single kid. It's different in different situations, navigating within the family. Like one of my kids completely believes and one of my kids just never did in our house. This has not become a problem yet, but I can see it being a problem down the road. You know, it's a tricky topic. [00:24:23] Speaker B: It is a tricky topic. Yeah. [00:24:26] Speaker A: You know, it's a tricky topic. And just even recognizing, like, there are some absolutely real, real, real feelings involved here that need to be honored. [00:24:38] Speaker B: Right. [00:24:40] Speaker A: You know, and respecting, again, other people's boundaries at that. [00:24:46] Speaker B: Exactly. [00:24:47] Speaker A: You know, definitely. You know, I had the magic ruined by some snotty kid on the bus. You know, it was not great. It was not a great experience. And. Yeah, that's hard. [00:25:04] Speaker B: It is hard. [00:25:09] Speaker A: You know, Definitely. In addition. Right. All those extra school activities that happen at the same time. [00:25:19] Speaker B: Why, why, why, why? [00:25:22] Speaker A: And why do we have to do. Feel like we're circling back on? Like, why do we have to do every single one of those of these things? And why does it have to be turned up to a hundred? [00:25:33] Speaker B: Right. [00:25:33] Speaker A: What happened to, like, you get a little. You get to decorate a cookie at school and call it a day? [00:25:39] Speaker B: Right. [00:25:40] Speaker A: I don't. I feel like you have a treat. Yeah. [00:25:44] Speaker B: Why is that? [00:25:44] Speaker A: We got to, like, maybe wear pajamas and watch a movie. [00:25:48] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:25:48] Speaker A: Perfect. Done. [00:25:49] Speaker B: There you go. [00:25:51] Speaker A: Just be done with it. We don't have to do everything turned up to 100 all the time. Right. All the time. [00:25:57] Speaker B: It seems like it is. [00:25:58] Speaker A: It does. It does seem like it is. You know, and then in addition to all of the activities that you have to navigate, the extended time off from. [00:26:13] Speaker B: School and all that means for everybody's schedule. [00:26:17] Speaker A: Yeah. You know, it's fun trying to work, you know, I mean, I. I have the privilege of a pretty flexible job where I can, you know, pick and choose and block time off for family and block time off for work. But that is not all the case. [00:26:43] Speaker B: Not everybody. [00:26:44] Speaker A: Always the case for everybody. And just to be kind of just feels like everybody wants, like, a piece of, you know. [00:26:52] Speaker B: Yep. [00:26:53] Speaker A: And it's like, I don't have the pieces left to give. [00:26:56] Speaker B: Right. [00:26:57] Speaker A: And again, I think that's like an everybody thing, but, like, turn up to a hundred when you have any kind of special consideration right in your house. It's like the holidays can feel like such an isolating time because it just, you know, you don't feel like people actually really do understand you. You know, you might have a bunch of people in the room. [00:27:28] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:27:29] Speaker A: But, like, you feel more lonely than you ever do sometimes at this time of year. And then you're being told, this is the greatest time of the year. It's the best. Everybody loves it. And it's like, this is such a conflated message. [00:27:43] Speaker B: Yes. [00:27:43] Speaker A: Because I'm not trying to be a Grinch. No, I do love. I mean, I. I love. [00:27:50] Speaker B: I love this time of year. [00:27:52] Speaker A: I love this time of year. I love trying to make the magic for my kids. I love the push and pull of all these, like, family traditions, all of these things that we do every year. And now watching my kids grow up in the same area I grew up in, I think that has a lot to do with it for me personally, you know, repeating experiences that I had or my husband had. Like, I love all of that, but I think what is not talked about is like, it's both. And I both love it. And it is the hardest, most frustrating time to be a parent of a kid with any kind of special need at all. [00:28:41] Speaker B: Yep. [00:28:41] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:28:43] Speaker B: Going to see the big guy for our kids with sensory issues. So hard. So hard. And every child is different. Some children love it, some children hate it. Some kids won't even go in the room. [00:29:01] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:29:02] Speaker B: And it's all over the place. [00:29:04] Speaker A: It is. [00:29:05] Speaker B: We actually gave up. [00:29:07] Speaker A: Yeah. We have stopped doing this as well. You know, partially just where my kids are, age wise, you know, it's okay to leave that in the rear view. And partially because I don't even as an adult, like, why am I forcing us on my kid? I mean, it just feels very. If that is something that floats your boat as a parent, more power to you. [00:29:44] Speaker B: But I think it's another expectation. [00:29:47] Speaker A: It is. It's a societal expectation. It's a family expectation. It's something. [00:29:54] Speaker B: Everybody wants the picture. [00:29:56] Speaker A: Everybody wants the picture, which we never get anyway. [00:29:59] Speaker B: So. [00:30:00] Speaker A: No, and no, I'm not purchasing that. That'll be $35. Like, I don't think so. [00:30:06] Speaker B: For a snapshot, a kid crying and the other one running away and the. [00:30:09] Speaker A: Other one going, yeah, I'm giving away hard pass that. And the idea that I don't Know, it's like that idea that, like, this is supposed to be so much fun, and then it's not. [00:30:23] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:30:24] Speaker A: You know, dealing with that space. I think, like, dealing with the space of. This is supposed to be the most magical, fun, wonderful time of the year. And then when even your own expectations. Society expectations, whatever. Like, when there's that gap. Right. [00:30:41] Speaker B: Like that big gap. [00:30:43] Speaker A: The therapy term is like, the pain is in the gap. And I think that's more true than ever around the holiday time. [00:30:51] Speaker B: Correct. And I'm just gonna add this last one because I think it's a very universal issue. The cold. And where the heck do our mittens and gloves go? [00:31:05] Speaker A: Oh, my God. We just purchased new ones, and they disappear and they're gone. [00:31:09] Speaker B: And then they're so expensive, and you have to do it again and again. [00:31:12] Speaker A: And again and again. Yeah. [00:31:16] Speaker B: I just sometimes want to glue it to them. [00:31:19] Speaker A: Agree. I totally agree. [00:31:21] Speaker B: They're worse than the socks. [00:31:22] Speaker A: It's. [00:31:23] Speaker B: It's worse than the socks. [00:31:24] Speaker A: Just because at least in the socks. [00:31:27] Speaker B: You can get a big package of socks, but you can never do that with gloves. [00:31:32] Speaker A: And just by the way, where we live, mittens, gloves, scarves, hat, all the things. Those are absolutely not optional here. We must. [00:31:40] Speaker B: We need to have them because of the cold. [00:31:43] Speaker A: It is not safe to go outdoors without those things, you know, for three months out of the year, for sure. Correct. And if we're being honest, a little longer than that. But in my head, I have to say three months so that we can still live here and like it, you know? [00:32:05] Speaker B: But yes, it's a thing. [00:32:07] Speaker A: Like, this has been a cathartic episode. [00:32:09] Speaker B: I do, too. [00:32:11] Speaker A: Sometimes just giving voice to these frustrations helps me embrace the things that I actually love about this time of year. [00:32:21] Speaker B: Yep. [00:32:21] Speaker A: So in our outside of dyslexia segment, what I thought would be kind of fun is since we. A little bit really Grinch a little bit, which is okay because it's my. It's my favorite time of year. What is one of your, like, best holiday memories? [00:32:45] Speaker B: Probably my husband and I's first Christmas together. [00:32:51] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:32:52] Speaker B: That was probably my favorite. We got a real tree. We had our puppy, and we were able to see everybody because we were on our own. [00:33:06] Speaker A: Yes. [00:33:06] Speaker B: And we were able to, like, just spread it out, and we were adults so we could do that, and it didn't get overwhelming. And because we were together. [00:33:20] Speaker A: Yeah. Yeah, I like that. Mine is really, like, similar. Mine is probably the first Christmas that we were married because we bought a house that, like, in. Within that Year, time frame. [00:33:36] Speaker B: Okay. [00:33:37] Speaker A: And that's when we started hosting Christmas Eve. So we host Christmas Eve at my house. [00:33:42] Speaker B: Nice. [00:33:44] Speaker A: And it is, like, by far my favorite because Christmas Eve for us is so people come over. Sometimes it's neighbors, sometimes it's friends. Always, like, our families, both sides, my in laws, my parents and my grandma. But it's kind of just open house style. We have appetizers. We do white elephant. It's fun, it's light. It's. You come in your pajamas if you want to. If that's not your jam, you don't have to do that. But, like, it's just a. Our house is, like, small, but it feels really cozy that time of year. It just definitely. It brightens it up. It lightens it up. It just. It is a really, really great night. And then I think, even though my son actually wasn't born that year, in my head, for some reason, my son's birthday is December 1st, so. And he's our first kid, so there's something about having, like a. Well, you know this because you also had babies. [00:35:00] Speaker B: Yeah, two babies in December and one in January. So. Yep. [00:35:04] Speaker A: Yeah. Like always, the. I don't know. There was just something about having an infant around Christmas. [00:35:12] Speaker B: It was so cool. [00:35:14] Speaker A: Special. It was so, so special. And it felt great. [00:35:18] Speaker B: It did. Yeah. All right. [00:35:30] Speaker A: Well, everybody, thank you for listening to our holiday Yikes episode. We really do hope this made you feel better. If you have your own holiday Yikes, please share. We'd be happy to talk more about that anytime. We just. We like being heard and we like when other families get to be heard, too. If you do like our show, please follow us on social media and reach out if you have any questions or would like us to discuss a topic. If you like our show and be sure to follow and rate us on your favorite podcast player. This is how we reach more listeners and we get to help more families. Thank you, everybody. [00:36:10] Speaker B: Thank you.